We Reward The Wrong Things When People Become Leaders
I think this is a space most leaders can resonate with. When you get promoted to leadership for the first time, it’s usually a really exciting moment in your career. Your work has been recognized, and with it comes a level of respect and authority that most haven’t had before. I remember the feeling very well.
But the majority of people don’t become leaders because they’re great at leading people. They become leaders because they’re good at the work.
(If there’s one thing worth sitting with here, it’s that distinction).
They hit deadlines, solve problems, and know their stuff. They’ve been reliable and gone above and beyond their role, so being promoted to leadership feels logical and deserved.
The problem is, even though the job has fundamentally changed, at the beginning the same skills that got them promoted are the ones still being rewarded – output, speed, certainty, being the one with the answer, and getting things done quickly and efficiently - especially when people feel stuck.
So naturally, that’s what leaders keep doing. They stay close to the work, make things move and fill in any gaps. And for a while that works, because things do move
The reality is that this is short-lived, and it’s no wonder then that over 60% of managers fail within the first 2 years in role. None of the things that actually make leadership work long-term are rewarded, measured or recognized in the same way. Things like:
Letting someone struggle a bit so they can grow
Holding boundaries
Having uncomfortable conversations
Creating space for others to think
Slowing things down when the pressure is high to create clarity instead of urgency
Naming what’s actually happening – calling out misalignment, confusion or tension
Having emotional stability under pressure – not reacting or passing stress down the line
And I get it; these things are harder to measure. They are slower to show impact, and because they’re not visibly rewarded, they (too often) get deprioritized, especially in high pressure environments.
So leaders keep doing what does get noticed. They stay visible, doing what’s valued and familiar.
Not because they’re avoiding leadership but because they’re responding to the system they are in.
Over time, this is where the cracks start to form.
Leaders feel stretched, uncertain and frustrated. Teams become dependent instead of empowered, engagement drops and decision-making bottlenecks. This is when people start to leave, often without pinpointing one single moment where things went wrong.
Misaligned rewards create leadership issues. It’s not bad intent, it’s poor capability.
So if we want sustainable leadership, we need to stop rewarding leaders for behaving like individual contributors.
Until we get clearer about what leadership actually requires and start rewarding that, we will keep seeing the same patterns repeat.
Not because leaders are failing, but because we’re asking them to play a new role while applauding the old one.
If this resonated, you’re not alone. I see this pattern come up again and again in leaders I work with.